double bubble disco queen headed to the guillotine

[hjack69]

WHO: Handsome Jack and YOU (and people)
WHERE: indecisive hand waving
WHEN: waving continues
WHAT: Catchall for any and all dumbass shenanigans he gets into + a few open starters.
WARNINGS: L... anguage..., suggestive content in the first prompt?

A ( misfire )

Look, we can do whatever the hell you want. Roses, Frenchy douchebag restaurant, repeatedly complimenting something other than your abs (nice abs btw), anything! Whatever. I'm game.

Except for that.

[ he is absolutely not waxing his legs, Christine.

fuckin misfires. ]

B ( and welcome 2 tha jam )

[ Sometimes even Jack needs to let off steam in ways that wouldn't fly anywhere else - he says he likes the workout, but really, he likes shoving and chin-checking and throwing elbows, and you can't get away with that in a lot of places.

Unless you play basketball. Dirty.

There's a court in the park he comes to sometimes, and he's there right now, shooting hoops by himself. No reading glasses, no snappy outfit here; he's got the tank and shorts combo going on, hair hanging haphazardly in his face. It's getting dull, though. There's just no edge when he plays by himself.

So hey, random pedestrian, you're getting a basketball tossed at your head. ]

Think fast!

C ( wildcard )

[ Hit me with anything or contact me privately at my plurk which I still can't remember how to link. ]

Comments

[hjack69]

Now you either play ball with me, kick off a game of x-treeme dodgeball, or run off whimpering.

[ Jack sets a hand on his hip, all cockiness and confidence. All three of these sound like perfectly serviceable options to him. ]

Gotta warn you though, I'm puh-retty much a basketball god? Like - Space Jam.

I'm basically the monsters in Space Jam, I wreck so much shit.

[ripplebeat]

[ The only times Joseph has played basketball was when he was in middle and high school, and was forced to do so.

How obvious will it be that he doesn't play much? It's not like he can just ... back down. No, that's just about impossible for him.

Regardless, he busts out laughing at the Space Jam comment. ]

Yeah, I can kick your ass if you want. I puh-retty much don't have anything better to do.

[ That ... might be a lie, but for Joseph, a challenge is a challenge and he's not about to bow. ]

[hjack69]

Then what the hell are you waiting for? A written invitation with a frickin' wax seal? [ He jerks his head. ] Get over here. Time's a-wastin'.

I'll even be nice - you can start us off.

[ripplebeat]

[ While the fight Joseph puts up against Jack is spirited and respectable, he still manages a loss by a margin more than narrow. The shame burns hot and bright in his guts.

He presses his lips in a thin line but it then gives way to a grin. ]

I don't think I did too bad for a guy who hasn't touched a basketball in, like, three years.

[hjack69]

Ya never had a chance, kiddo.

[ For being his age, Jack's surprisingly spry on the court - mostly because he likes to toe the line between playing fair-ish and and straight up tripping, so Joseph better stay on his toes for the match. But by the time it's over, Jack is breathing hard, giving the ball another toss to Joseph. ]

I'm, like, twice your age. Gotta step it up if you don't want me to make you look bad.

[ripplebeat]

[ Joseph dribbles the ball a couple times, idly, laughter low on his breath. ]

Well, thank fuck no one I know was around to see. Maybe I'll tell my room mates back home I kicked some old man's ass at basketball, see what they believe.

[hjack69]

Yeah, but if they get one look at me later, they're probably gonna kick your ass. Because they're gonna be like, wow, is that Jack, he's so good at basketball, I can't believe this punk lied let's jump him. Or something.

[ Yep he does high-pitched voices and fluttering eyes for the impression bit. ]

I kinda have that effect on people.