Okita Souji (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
spes_phthisica) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
recolle2017-07-19 11:51 pm
spes_phthisica) wrote in recolle2017-07-19 11:51 pm
[OPEN + CLOSED] Ska vi lägga pussel, eller ska vi spela schack...
WHO: Soujirou & You & also some people
WHERE: All over the place
WHEN: Varying dates during July
WHAT:Belated Bingo things, general catchall
WARNINGS: TERRIBLE ROMANCE NOVEL QUOTES.
[As soon as he'd received the mysterious bingo thing, Soujirou had immediately sat down with it like any grownass adult would and tried to work out the best way to win. Some things were fairly quickly nixed, mainly things concerning unnecessary sharing of feelings. Unless he can find a way to work around them, he's not interested. But happily, that leaves plenty of options that are potentially dangerous or just plain dumb, and that suits Soujirou far better.]
i. Combo moves work poorly in real life (Open)
[You'd think the logical thing to do would be to immediately clear the middle square, but no. Because one of the challenges Soujirou had been presented with had seemed so much more tempting. "Play a prank on an authority figure". Natrually.
So here's Soujirou, with a big stack of paper under one arm, every page of which appears to be a copy out of a paperback novel spread. A closer look would show that the book in question is titled, The Outlaw Viking. He's on his way back to set his plan in motion, when he suddenly notices that the fence of the park he's crossing to is... waist high. Didn't the bingo card say...?
It's an absolutely terrible idea. If he really must do this at all, he really ought to set down all those papers at first. But no, he's a fool, and he decides that this is the moment to run up and gracefully fling himself over the fence in a truly dramatic fashion and-
-aaaand get his bag stuck on said fence, and go over in an equally dramatic but not quite so graceful fashion. The papers go flying all over the sidewalk and all around everyone trying to walk peacefully along it. Soujirou manages to roll with the fall, but he's ruined a pair of nice leggings and scraped up both knees, and he looks rather sheepish where he sits.]
...That didn't go quite as I planned it.
ii. Smoldering eyes and heaving bosoms (Closed to Fai)
[It is later that day; Soujirou has two big bandaids covering both knees, his fingers are lightly stained with highlighter, and HIS BRILLIANT PLAN IS COMPLETE.
Which is to say that he's been sneaking around all over the offices where Fai and his colleagues - and currently Soujirou - work, armed with those nice copies he's made of Fai's romance novel and some tape. They're just about everywhere now. Inside the cupboards in the small office kitchen, hanging in front of computer monitors, over or even inside a couple of shared trashcans. Several of them are crowded on the communal notice board, and one is even arranged so that it will dangle in front of you when you open the copier.
Of course, Soujirou would never hang outright porn all over the place. They do get minors in there, after all, and Fai could get in real trouble like that. No, he's carefully chosen pages which include some particularil ridiculous and over-the-top writing, and perhaps one or two which still make it clear what general genre the novel belongs to, without ever getting inappropriate.
He has even been kind enough to highlight some of his favorite parts. (Such as: "unexplainable pride coursed through her when she watched the corded muscles of his forearms flex", "How would she ever be able to penetrate the utter emptiness at the bottom of his desolate eyes?" and "The gods surely showed their displeasure by dumping this feminine blight on me this day".) Just to be helpful.
And then he decides to wait for Fai to decide with a cup of tea in the kitchen. Giggling more or less constantly, like the little shit he is.]
iii. Piracy is a great career move (Open)
[A couple of days later, Soujirou has hopefully learned from his previous mistakes. That is to say, he has chosen to deal with that middle square and thereby to do something less hazardous to himself and those around him.
The great thing about working at a daycare? You can absolutely find plastic swords whenever you need them. It comes with the minor drawback of being sized for a four-year-old, but who needs realism when you have imagination, determination, and a complete lack of any kind of knowledge about pirates?
Seriously, someone call this landlubber out. He may suddenly have memories of being a pirate, but he has NO IDEA what he's doing. At all.]
Hands on me yardladder! [Yep, that is something he just said. While pointing a plastic sword at you, whoever you are. That's not even proper pirate speech, he's just making shit up. He's also tied a paisley scarf around his head.]
iv. Can't buy Jim love (Closed to Juzo)
[The upseide is that he loves buying gifts. The downside, or at least the confusing side, is that he doesn't really know either of the people he's buying for - or even if he likes them very much, OR if they're actually getting married for real.
Oh well. It's not really his problem, right?
What is his problem is that half the registry seems to be gag gifts - maybe? - and the other half is still tricky to figure out for strangers. Which is why he is completely unabashed about turning around and practically draping a shower curtain over the closest available victim.]
Here, hold this!
[Just going to step back and behold this adorable llama, frowning slightly.]
I'm not sure if this is a weird thing to get for your wedding or not. What do you think? Is it weird?
v. No blues blues (Closed to Kashuu)
[Usually, Soujirou very evidently doesn't care about his appearance, but this is difference. It's one thing that half his hair was a washed-out turquoise basically forever, that's still kind of fun. But grey? Grey is boring, and also makes him look like he's his parents' age from behind. It's weird.
Hair styling cost money, but Kiyomitsu has been complaining about his hair forever. So why not kill two birds with one stone? Not to say that he won't offer to pay for the products used and so on anyway, but at least it won't be salon prices.
...Let's be real, he knows Kiyomitsu might actually pay him to get to fix the disaster that is his hair.
So yes, here's Soujirou, turning up at his friend's place with a big smile, ready to be bossed around and berated. HE'S PREPARED.He thinks he's prepared.]
So... I'm guessing I don't get a say in what you're about to do, huh?
WHERE: All over the place
WHEN: Varying dates during July
WHAT:
WARNINGS: TERRIBLE ROMANCE NOVEL QUOTES.
[As soon as he'd received the mysterious bingo thing, Soujirou had immediately sat down with it like any grownass adult would and tried to work out the best way to win. Some things were fairly quickly nixed, mainly things concerning unnecessary sharing of feelings. Unless he can find a way to work around them, he's not interested. But happily, that leaves plenty of options that are potentially dangerous or just plain dumb, and that suits Soujirou far better.]
i. Combo moves work poorly in real life (Open)
[You'd think the logical thing to do would be to immediately clear the middle square, but no. Because one of the challenges Soujirou had been presented with had seemed so much more tempting. "Play a prank on an authority figure". Natrually.
So here's Soujirou, with a big stack of paper under one arm, every page of which appears to be a copy out of a paperback novel spread. A closer look would show that the book in question is titled, The Outlaw Viking. He's on his way back to set his plan in motion, when he suddenly notices that the fence of the park he's crossing to is... waist high. Didn't the bingo card say...?
It's an absolutely terrible idea. If he really must do this at all, he really ought to set down all those papers at first. But no, he's a fool, and he decides that this is the moment to run up and gracefully fling himself over the fence in a truly dramatic fashion and-
-aaaand get his bag stuck on said fence, and go over in an equally dramatic but not quite so graceful fashion. The papers go flying all over the sidewalk and all around everyone trying to walk peacefully along it. Soujirou manages to roll with the fall, but he's ruined a pair of nice leggings and scraped up both knees, and he looks rather sheepish where he sits.]
...That didn't go quite as I planned it.
ii. Smoldering eyes and heaving bosoms (Closed to Fai)
[It is later that day; Soujirou has two big bandaids covering both knees, his fingers are lightly stained with highlighter, and HIS BRILLIANT PLAN IS COMPLETE.
Which is to say that he's been sneaking around all over the offices where Fai and his colleagues - and currently Soujirou - work, armed with those nice copies he's made of Fai's romance novel and some tape. They're just about everywhere now. Inside the cupboards in the small office kitchen, hanging in front of computer monitors, over or even inside a couple of shared trashcans. Several of them are crowded on the communal notice board, and one is even arranged so that it will dangle in front of you when you open the copier.
Of course, Soujirou would never hang outright porn all over the place. They do get minors in there, after all, and Fai could get in real trouble like that. No, he's carefully chosen pages which include some particularil ridiculous and over-the-top writing, and perhaps one or two which still make it clear what general genre the novel belongs to, without ever getting inappropriate.
He has even been kind enough to highlight some of his favorite parts. (Such as: "unexplainable pride coursed through her when she watched the corded muscles of his forearms flex", "How would she ever be able to penetrate the utter emptiness at the bottom of his desolate eyes?" and "The gods surely showed their displeasure by dumping this feminine blight on me this day".) Just to be helpful.
And then he decides to wait for Fai to decide with a cup of tea in the kitchen. Giggling more or less constantly, like the little shit he is.]
iii. Piracy is a great career move (Open)
[A couple of days later, Soujirou has hopefully learned from his previous mistakes. That is to say, he has chosen to deal with that middle square and thereby to do something less hazardous to himself and those around him.
The great thing about working at a daycare? You can absolutely find plastic swords whenever you need them. It comes with the minor drawback of being sized for a four-year-old, but who needs realism when you have imagination, determination, and a complete lack of any kind of knowledge about pirates?
Seriously, someone call this landlubber out. He may suddenly have memories of being a pirate, but he has NO IDEA what he's doing. At all.]
Hands on me yardladder! [Yep, that is something he just said. While pointing a plastic sword at you, whoever you are. That's not even proper pirate speech, he's just making shit up. He's also tied a paisley scarf around his head.]
iv. Can't buy Jim love (Closed to Juzo)
[The upseide is that he loves buying gifts. The downside, or at least the confusing side, is that he doesn't really know either of the people he's buying for - or even if he likes them very much, OR if they're actually getting married for real.
Oh well. It's not really his problem, right?
What is his problem is that half the registry seems to be gag gifts - maybe? - and the other half is still tricky to figure out for strangers. Which is why he is completely unabashed about turning around and practically draping a shower curtain over the closest available victim.]
Here, hold this!
[Just going to step back and behold this adorable llama, frowning slightly.]
I'm not sure if this is a weird thing to get for your wedding or not. What do you think? Is it weird?
v. No blues blues (Closed to Kashuu)
[Usually, Soujirou very evidently doesn't care about his appearance, but this is difference. It's one thing that half his hair was a washed-out turquoise basically forever, that's still kind of fun. But grey? Grey is boring, and also makes him look like he's his parents' age from behind. It's weird.
Hair styling cost money, but Kiyomitsu has been complaining about his hair forever. So why not kill two birds with one stone? Not to say that he won't offer to pay for the products used and so on anyway, but at least it won't be salon prices.
...Let's be real, he knows Kiyomitsu might actually pay him to get to fix the disaster that is his hair.
So yes, here's Soujirou, turning up at his friend's place with a big smile, ready to be bossed around and berated. HE'S PREPARED.
So... I'm guessing I don't get a say in what you're about to do, huh?