recolle | [Closed] Who let the dogs out!?

[Closed] Who let the dogs out!?

WHO: Sabo and Souji
WHERE: A park
WHEN:5/27
WHAT: Excited dogs bring people together.
WARNINGS: None.

[It's a rule of life that every dog owner learns that no matter what else might be happening your dog will need to be taken out at some point or there will be consequences. Messy, messy consequences. Luckily today is a rather nice day even with everything that's been going on which means that Sabo is taking Kiwi to one of the parks for a longer walk/run.

Since Kiwi is a mostly well behaved and obedient dog who is quick to come when called Sabo tends to let her off her leash once they get away from traffic. Mostly, of course, turns out to be the operative word because halfway through their first lap something catches her attention and off she goes like a tiny, furry rocket, completely unheeding of Sabo's call to stop, heel or even fuss.

The something, or rather someone, which caught her attention is a young man with a bokuto. Or 'nice, moving stick-like thing that might be thrown for me to fetch if I'm cute enough' as Kiwi would like to call it. Never mind that it's probably too big for her to even fit between her tiny jaws, no dog of Sabo's will ever be afraid to dream big. She does her best to communicate all of this by alternating wiggling in excitement with spinning in even more excited circles, all the while panting happily and making tiny whuffing noises.]

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[It's frustrating, really, the way one little setback in his health brings him back almost to square one. He'd actually been making headway with his training, and while it was slow going, it had felt worth it to not feel quite so helpless whenever something new happens.

And then he gets sick, and suddenly it feels like he's never made any progress at all.

Okay, so logically he knows that if he hadn't been putting in the effort, he'd be feeling even weaker than normal after a dip like that, so it's still worth the effort. He knows that. Logically. But it's still frustrating.

You know what's a great cure for frustration? Adorable dogs.]

Oh. Hi there! [Soujirou is a little bit winded, but he nonetheless crouches down with a big smile on his face, carefully keeping the bokuto out of dog range while reaching out a hand for it to sniff.] I'm afraid this stick is a bit too big for you. Maybe we can find something smaller? [He looks up at the somewhat frazzled man he can only assume is the owner, grinning.] I love poms! [That... is also a way of saying hello.]

[Kiwi noses at the outstretched hand and licks at it as she darts from one side of the hand to the other, stopping from time to chew of it in a way that somehow manages to be both carefully gentle and very excited at the same time. And while she's demonstrated quite a bit of disobedience already she's at least still obedient enough not to jump after the 'stick'.

Sabo is a bit out of breath when he finally reaches them and while he normally would have collared her straight away the person she's with seems happy with her enough for him to hold off for now.

His answering smile is somewhat chagrined.] Yeah, she's lucky she's so cute. [He says it with a pointed look at the dog which goes completely unnoticed.] Gets her out of all kinds of trouble. Still, I'm sorry if she disturbed you.

[Soujirou - who has of course never gotten himself out of well-deserve trouble by being cute - laughs at Sabo's words, cooing softly over the dog's antics. It's been quite a while since he's been able to volunteer at the animal shelter, and of course animals aren't allowed in the hospital, so really, he's overdue some being chewed at by an adorable pupper.]

It's okay. I don't think anything is as important as petting dogs, right? Especially not exercise.

[He says it lightly, trying not to recall that there had been a time when nothing, not even eating or sleeping, had been as important as exercise.]

I'm Soujirou, by the way. Thank you for setting your dog loose on me~.

[Sabo's smile widens and loses most of the chagrin.]

Not much. I suppose it could be seen as an energizing break.

[He sits down on the grass, with Soujirou crouched down it had begun to feel a bit awkward and looming to remain standing.]

And you're welcome. I'm Sabo, and the energetic ball of fluff is Kiwi. [He pauses and considers her for a moment with a fond look.] We've been working a bit on proper greetings, but I think she's a bit too excited at the moment to even attempt it. You'll just have to settle for the drool.

[He nods towards bokuto.]

So what were you exercising?

Exactly! What better way of recharging your batteries, right?

[And more to the point, what better way of washing away frustration and defeatism than on a happy tide of dog slobber? Sometimes you're in dire need of something 100% positive to enter your life.

Soujirou takes Sabo sitting down as a sign that he ought to too, sinking down gratefully in sezia despite still being a bit tired. Maybe he can get the cute dog to come up into his lap? Priorities.]

Mm? Oh, kendo, mostly. I used to do it a lot when I was younger but... it's been a while. [Talking about it lightly and evasively seems to be the best way to just... not deal with his feelings.] I'm a little out of practice, and I thought it might come in handy.

Right. Much more healthy than coffee too, though probably just about as addictive.

[Kiwi gets up on her hind legs and puts her front paws as far up Soujirou's knees as she can reach, panting happily, before moving down again to spin around in circle a couple if times. She darts over to Sabo and buffs his hand, spinning around again as he scratches lightly behind her ears and around her tiny face before sprinting back to Soujirou to put her front paws up on his knees again. While she might possibly need a bit of assistance it probably won't take much to encourage her to climb all the way up.]

Yeah, I get that. I've sorta been considering something similar but the only weapon I've even learned how to use is a gun and, uh... [He shrugs and makes a face that pretty clearly illustrates his distaste and reluctance to the idea.] Kendo sounds like it'd be more fun. It's, ah, a Japanese sword fighting style thing, right? I say as I potentially expose my uncultured ass for what it is.

And unlike coffee, you don't have to cover her in cream and syrup to make her acceptable. She's sweet just the way she is.

[He is absolutely 100% going to scoop this tiny dog up in his lap and lower his face so that she can give him kisses. Truly this is the the best way to live.

He winces a little bit at the thought of a gun too, even though it would probably be more reasonable for someone as fragile as him to learn how to shoot as a backup. But the thing he always loved about kendo was the effort, the grace, the art of it. Not the violence. And to him, that's all a gun is good for.] Mmm, I see the problem. I'd be pretty reluctant to use a gun too. [He scratches the dog's ears, smiling.]

And that's basically it, yes. Don't worry, I'm terribly bad at Japanese culture and history too, and you probably have more of an excuse than I do. [A small grimace.] So you've never done any fencing, anything like that? Or just fought other kids with sticks?

[Sabo snorts, his shoulders shaking with laughter.]

Yeah no. While she might enjoy rolling around in it, 'cause she'll roll in anything and especially if it's gross and sticky, I think I prefer her without such additives.

[Kiwi does her best to cover any bit of Soujirou's face she can reach with enthusiastic doggy kisses before wiggling around to ensure that she gets petted all over. And if Soujurou were to grow too lax with said petting she will immediately ensure to remedy that by buffing her head against his hand and/or gently gnaw on it a bit.

Sabo on the other hand spends a moment picturing what his father's face might have looked like if he'd ever suggested fencing lessons, and it is beautiful.]

Nah, nothing like that. I know a bit of basic self-defense Marine Corps style and, I mean, I might have had my rowdy moments growing up but I've kind of tried to stay away from learning how to hurt people too easily. [He's a bit hesitant admitting this, because while this is something he's been encouraged to learn to be open about he's not always sure when it's a suitable time to mention it and, more importantly, when it's really not.] I have done, and still do, acrobatics and parkour though, neither of which is exactly useless if I have to defend myself. So at least there's that. And, of course, I also have my ferocious guard dog to protect me. [If his previous comment about hurting people has caused any discomfort he hopes that this teasing comment will at least help alleviate it.]

Edited 2018-05-31 20:32 (UTC)

[He stills a bit as Sabo mentions hurting people, although he's still carefully stroking Kiwi's ears and scratching under her chin. He'd never really been interested in hurting anyone either, not like some of the kids who came to practice because they were bullies - or because they were bullied, sometimes.]

Mm... I never really had the option, I guess. I mean, in a sense, hurting people was kind of a natural talent for me. [He laughs quietly.] That sounds awful, doesn't it?

But I was six or so when this other kid who was doing kendo challenged me to a duel. I didn't know anything about it at the time, but we both really went at it, and... well, I ended up winning. I beat the other kid pretty badly, too.

[He grimaces slightly.]

My parents wisely decided then that if I was going to get into situations like that, I might at least know what I'm doing. So they signed me up for kendo right then. [His smile widens a bit.] And that kid ended up being one of my best friends, so it wasn't all bad!

[Sabo shrugs and doesn't bother to say that yes, in a way that does sound kind of bad. It's not as if the answer he gives instead is any less true.]

Not necessarily. I've been told that it's what you actually do with your natural talents and inclinations that's the important part. So as long as you're not going around hurting people just for fun, or because you can, you're probably fine.

Sometimes a weapon can be more dangerous in an untrained hand than a trained one. Still I'm glad your story had an happy ending. [He smiles.] And it sounds like learning the art properly worked out pretty well for you?

[Worked out pretty well for him... Hah. His hand twitches a bit around the handle of the bokuto. Yes, it had worked out perfectly right up until the point where his stupid lungs had given out. He glances down at the dog and swallows hard, reminding himself that it's not Sabo's fault, and he'd meant no harm. At least having his chin vigorously licked does a lot to calm down those conflicting emotions.]

Well, like I said, I'm kind of out of practice now. But I still have a couple of friends around because of it, so I guess you're right.

[He looks up with a bright smile, because smiling is usually so much easier than expressing more complicated feelings.]

Anyway, if you've done acrobatics and things like that, I'd say it should probably be pretty easy for you to pick up some sort of martial art. Hitting is only a small part of it, really. I've done kendo, aikido and thai boxing, and honestly most of it is foot work.

[Soujirou's reaction doesn't go unnoticed but since Sabo has no real idea of what he might have said to cause it, and really doesn't know him well enough to be able to ask about it without the risk of just making things worse or awkward being far too high there's not much he can do about it.]

Wow, that's impressive.

[He bites his lip and sighs, and when he begins to speak again the hesitation from when he spoke of staying away from learning how to hurt people is back.]

I guess I'm just not sure if it would be good for me to learn. There's a reason I stayed away from it in the past and while it's probably not as pressing now as it was then I'm not not sure if it's gone away either. [He shakes his head with a short laugh.] And I'm pretty sure you didn't sign up for this conversation to head in this somewhat heavy direction so if you'd rather we changed the subject to something lighter that's totally fine.

[Soujirou tilts his head a little bit, noting that he seems to have struck a nerve there - and because there really isn't a spiteful or vengeful bone in his body, all he feels is that he's genuinely sorry he did. So he listens, gently putting the bokuto on the ground as he unconsciously leans closer. He really isn't much good at personal space, and he's trying to figure out the expression on Sabo's face.]

No no, it's fine. [He'd deflected to a lighter topic because things had gotten too close to his own feelings, and he doesn't know how to deal with them. But with the troubles of others, he's a lot more reliable. He enjoys being helpful.]

You say there's a reason... Would you mind telling me what that reason is?

I'm pretty fine talking about. It's finding the right words that the hardest bit I think. Oh, that and the right time and place I guess.

[He smiles to show that he actually is fine and while it's a relatively small smile it's still genuine enough.]

And I've had some practice. I was kind of forced into anger management classes when I was fifteen. It was either that or juvie. It wasn't so much that I was starting fights, despite my very short temper I was rarely the initial instigator, but once I was in them I tended to do a lot of damage. As in being in need of a hospital kind of damage.

[He looks at Soujirou, trying to gauge his reaction. It's not that he's ashamed of his past, really, but he's still very aware of its potential to make others feel uncomfortable.]

[Soujirou's smile quirks a little bit. He can absolutely understand why Sabo is so nervous about talking about it, because it's true that a lot of people can... well, misunderstand a confession like that. It's not a strange reaction. God, he can still remember Fai's face after he picked up that bottle in that bar fight, the way he'd stared at him. Not quite afraid, but certainly not sure what he thought of him either.

Slowly scratching Kiwi's ears, he picks his words carefully as he speaks.]

It's not like you're ever out to hurt someone, but well, when someone starts something, when it gets serious... [With his free hand, he twirls a clover flower between his fingers.] ...it's like someone kind of flips a switch in your head, right? You can't hold back. Because everything gets so simple and the solution is just that you need to finish the fight before the other person does. Whatever it takes.

...That kind of thing?

Edited 2018-06-01 00:51 (UTC)

[Sabo blinks, momentarily confused by how Soujirou could manage to hit the nail right head before understanding dawns on him and his expression is both grateful and sad. Because while true understanding is rare he wouldn't wish it on anyone.]

Yes. That's exactly it. Like everything is suddenly making a different kind of sense and there's no reason not to

[And it's because of this understanding that he suddenly finds himself laying down the whole truth and nothing but the truth, even those bits he would usually keep to himself.]

I don't want to hurt people. Except for sometimes, when that switch is flipped, when I do. Because it's what they would do. Or because they deserve it. And even though it's not something I'd do with the switched turned off I still can't find it in myself to feel particularly bad about it. I can regret my actions but actual guilt is much more rare.

[For so long, the only one who really understood this kind of thing in Soujirou's life had been Yasusada... and even so, not quite. Yasusada thinks a lot less about it, doesn't really question it. If asked, he'd probably just say that some people do deserve it, and then just shrug it off. Because he doesn't really see that there's something off about being like that, or maybe he just doesn't care.

So it's a relief to find someone who thinks about it a little more like he does. Who has actually worried about being dangerous to others; who has compared himself to others and thought, "something's not quite right here".]

I know what you mean. [He stops gazing off in the distance - it's not that interesting anyway, now that all the colors are gone - and offers Sabo a small smile.] I'd get into fights a lot too. With bullies, pretty often. Then later on with, you know, guys with wandering hands, that kind of thing. Or sometimes it would just be sparring that went out of hand.

[He presses his lips together for a moment.] I felt bad because I knew that you shouldn't be someone who does that kind of thing, or because it would scare people who cared about me, but I'd never feel all that bad about the fights. And I knew I shouldn't be able to just... shrug it off and forget it the next day, but I always could.

[He hums softly.] ...But you know, my parents weren't wrong when they signed me up for Kendo. Maybe it made me better at fighting, but it also made sure I understood fighting. At least it kept me from hurting someone really badly by accident. I think that's good to know, if you've got no choice but to fight.

[Sabo nods and there's a flash of a wry, cynical smile before it softens into something more gentle and understanding. Bullies had been a common 'target' for him as well and while pretty much any of the actual sparring he'd done had always been with a much more skilled professional, and therefore they never truly got out of hand, it doesn't take much imagination to figure out how easily it could have happened if he'd trained more with his peers.

His experience of wandering hands is a bit different too, though the end result probably wasn't very different, since he's never been the target of it much himself. Apparently he wasn't the type people usually went for when trying to cop a feel despite the baby/pretty-boy face he's been cursed with. According to his friends it was canceled out by the 'mess with me and I'll fuck you up and not in a good and life affirming way' vibe he gave off. Said friends weren't always so lucky though, especially his female ones and it hadn't been uncommon for him to deliver a black eye or a broken nose to some bastard who'd crossed the line with them, or anyone else for that matter. Sabo's never been the type to just ignore that kind of shit just because it's happening to a stranger. So he can see how Soujirou; pretty, slender, possibly even 'a bit like a girl' would be a rather popular target.]

Maybe it would have been different if my anger and destructive tendencies had been more random. I mean, did the ones I fought deserve what they ended up getting? As a rule I'd say they didn't, but they sure as hell deserved something. [The wry, cynical smile from before makes a brief reappearance again, this time with a more teeth.] Still, doesn't make the lack of empathy less frightening, does it?

[He sigs and moves around so that he's lying on his side.]

You could be right. I still don't think it would have been a good idea back then, partly because when it comes to some things my dad is like a bad stereotype of the Tough Marine™️. But I am in a different place now, emotionally and mentally, and while I'm not sure I'd like to say that my social safety net is better these days it's definitely a more permanent one. Might be enough to make it work. And it would be something to use that wasn't a gun.

So... if I were to try it. Got any suggestions on what it is I should try?

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[Closed] Who let the dogs out!?

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