recolle | [OPEN]

Entry tags:

[OPEN]

WHO: Nanashi and friends
WHERE: Inside the city, going around places
WHEN: 4/7
WHAT: He's dealing with the loss of his humanity and turning undead.
WARNINGS: Mentions of death and dying all over this post. Usual Megaten warnings apply.

1. In the streets

[If you're the type of person who hangs around the streets of Recolle at night, you may find Nanashi all by himself. He mumbles nonsensical phrases and sometimes shouts loudly. It's almost disruptive, but he really doesn't care about that. Nanashi can sense the presence of spirits more strongly than before. Honestly, it's both pissing him off and tripping him out. ]

Would you stop that already? You've been at it for hours.... [Why were there so many things he couldn't see before? Why is retrospec doing this to him? Nanashi shakes his head in disbelief. ]

What is so fun about dancing without a shirt on? Oh my god. I regret everything, I'm sorry I've sinned in my past life.

Now stop haunting me. Take this as an offering.

[Nanashi passes your character two silver coins for good luck!! Are you going to take it or not?]

[For characters who've known Nanashi from before: you'd notice his eyes are green instead of brown like in his icons. ]

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2. In the forest

["This gun is fake". It's an excuse he's used many times before. and he's gotten away with owning a pistol so far. Nanashi feels like trying it out in the open. He's right outside the city borders with a demon and a pistol. Surely, nothing will go wrong. Just leave a 15yold with guns. This is fine.

Tin cans are lined up all in a row and he's using them for target practice. He hasn't missed anything yet. They all have noticeable dents and holes in them. Nanashi's reaction times are a bit slow however. It's taking him such a long time reload every shot. His hands feel numb and it's hard for him to move in general. Eventually he puts everything down and tries to rest. Take a breather.

You can either find him:

a. shooting things and reloading bullets in realtime
b. taking it easy chilling with a demonic bird. or
c. wild card me because these aren't terribly interesting. ]

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3. Anywhere inside the city

[Nanashi awkwardly stumbles and can't seem to hold his ground. Being undead is exhausting. At this rate he may never pull himself together again. He decides that he'll give up and stop moving for a while. This is the worst!!!

If you're unlucky he'll crash right into you. Surprise.

Otherwise, he can be found taking a nap on a bench somewhere. Let the kid rest....or wake him up rudely. That works too. He did run away from home without warning. Nanashi looks like a disaster. ]

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[Inside Jouhei's place: Closed - Jouhei, Shinn. ]

[Nanashi spent most of his day normally. He's staying at Jouhei's place for various reasons. They had dinner and now he was planning on sitting next to the sofa. The next thing he does is open up a history book. It's not like Nanashi knows what he wants to be when he grows up yet. He just entered highschool and adjusting to the new content is hard. He still tries to put effort into learning it though. Getting a good job is important to him and everything.

After sometime he falls asleep on the sofa. School can be draining. He shifts to the side awkwardly.

A few minutes later he rolls over and drops to the floor. Of course this causes him to wake up in surprise. All the energy in his body suddenly disappeared. That's not the weird part. Suddenly his senses seem off somehow.
His body doesn't feel like his own. The world feels like a colder place too. Nanashi can't get off the floor even if he puts all his effort into it.

So instead he screams very loudly. Jouhei would have heard that. He's banking on his cousin to be around. Help? Jouheiiiii.

Nanashi thinks he's going to die for real.

Did he eat something weird for dinner that day? Nope.
Did some thug sucker punch him on the way home from school? Not at all. He's been staying out of fights for the most part.

The fact that all of this is happening is very surreal. Screaming for help is tiring so he may just go fall asleep again.

Jouhei can slap this kid awake or something. ]

[My plurk is

presages

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[He didn't think it would be so simple. ]

That's it? Going through your day normally? Having expectations for the future?

[Minato's answer throws him in for a loop. Nanashi isn't sure how to respond. He can still be present if his physical state isn't ideal. It'll be difficult to adjust at first. His body feels stiff and his limbs are unusually heavy. Once he gets used to that it might be possible to go back to the way things were before. He thinks about how nice it would be to return to that normality. ]

I still have to think about what it means...for myself. Once I find an answer I'll go back home.

That's it. [ For him, anyways, and he feels the need to emphasize that he knows it's different for different people. Most people... they need a little more. They need goals and purposes and all these concrete things. Minato just wants to get to a place where he's happy to exist. ]

...You're going to go off and do some soul searching?

[He nods.]

I need to figure this out on my own. Sorry for making you worry, senpai.

[ You may be wondering "why the sudden apology?" Well, He's sorry for being such a pain in the ass to deal with. Nanashi's going to try and pull himself together. He just needs time. It'll be okay. ]

My head's a mess. Got too many things to think about. I keep telling myself it's easier to run away than find an answer to it all...

[ That won't solve anything though. ]

[ They're familiar words, which makes Minato pause, because this isn't a place where he should butt in, either as a senpai or as a friend. "Do what you got to do" is what he said, and he believes in it; making that decision is how people learn. ]

It is easier, and it's fine for a while. But then time passes and... then what? It's like you're running in place. It's exhausting.

[ You have to face things someday. ]

[It is exhausting, Minato's right. Hm.. Nanashi can feel himself remembering something weird. Why does this always happen when he's hanging out with Minato? Honestly, Nanashi can't even say he's surprised by any of it. They're talking about heavy subjects. Perhaps his old self dealt with something in a similar manner.

Nanashi's expression dims as the memory plays out. He can hear these words echo from some place 'You’re dead. And that friend of yours is next in line. You’ve accomplished nothing in the admittedly short span of your life.'. Well, shit. His past self must have been trash. That doesn't have to be him, does it?

He can still change things. It doesn't have to be like that...again. Nanashi shakes his head as if he's trying to get rid of any negative thoughts. ]

I'm already tired of running in circles. I'll try to sort it out somehow....My other self couldn't do it. He died before doing anything meaningful. Remember I mentioned it to you before?

[They talked about dying in memories for a while. Yikes. ]

[ That brief lag in conversation is always a tell-tale sign to Minato that the other person's zoning out, and he holds his breath, watching Nanashi's expression, trying to tell whether it's a good or bad memory he's being thrown into.

Maybe not a good one. From Nanashi's words, it doesn't sound like a good time. ]

...Yeah. He died when he was around your age, right? That's young.

[ And there's people who go their entire lives without doing anything meaningful. That's sort of what Minato feels applies to him, too. ]

[Makes you feel bad learning that you've died without doing anything at all. ]

It didn't end after his death. I have so many memories of dying. Humans can only die once, right? I don't think that applied to him.

[Nanashi's past self must have been some kind of immortal or someone with an unusual body. He's not exactly sure what this is either. It's just bizarre. ]

Did your other self go through something like that?

[Minato, your past self seemed just as wild. Just saying. ]

[ Why are you always dying!!! I feel like I wrote that in a tag before already ]

Just the one time I told you about already, where I got revived almost immediately. The rest of the deaths I've seen... they were all final.

[ They were all unfortunately human, and so is he. ]

[You probably have....!! Rip. Nanashi's shoulders slump and he frowns. ]

Sorry to hear that.

[ Dealing with death and loss is never easy. Minato's experienced that feeling before. Nanashi is open to talking about it with him because of this. He's grateful for it. They have some common ground and it's not entirely one sided. ]

Senpai? I'm not even sure if I can still die now. It's scary to think about.

[ CAN YOU KILL A ZOMBIE?? ]

[ He's seen a lot of death and it never gets easier, regardless of if it's a stranger or his own parents that slip away past his fingers, echoes of a past he's allowed to watch but not change. He doesn't want to see any more of that, but this isn't his decision either. ]

I don't know either. But maybe don't try, just in case. Stone is immortal, but it can still be eroded... that sort of thing.

[ Maybe Nanashi can't properly die, but if he breaks or disappears, that's just as bad. ]

Yeah, I don't have a death wish so I'm not going to do anything crazy.

[He tries to smile in an attempt to be reassuring but it's a half hearted one at best. He is just so tired. ]

This made me think that I was taking advantage of my life before. I didn't realize how good it was. If I disappeared for real then I'd miss everyone.

[Yes, he'd miss you too Minato. ]

Good...

[ It's good to hear, but Nanashi also fights yakuza members so maybe his definition of "anything crazy" is a little skewed. ]

We'd miss you too. So take a break if it helps, but come back.

I will.

[Of course. He considers getting hospitalized "crazy" but as long as he can make it through the day without injury then it's fine. Trouble is normal. Nanashi's voice lacks the usual energy it contains. ]

I don't know what I'm going to tell my sister. She might flip out on me. Maybe I'll just say I'm sick. Caught something serious when I left the city.

[It's not really a lie. It's not really the truth either.]

Either I come up with a good excuse or I'll never be able to face my family again...

[That would suck. He hates the yakuza but not all of his family is terrible. There's Jouhei to think about too. Nanashi can't be selfish and run away forever.]

Ever come up with an excuse for having a dead body before? [N...o...]

[ Minato isn't dead, Nanashi.......... So no, he doesn't really have a good excuse he can offer; he can only hope that Nanashi never has to go to a hospital for any reason, because then he'll get hooked up to all sorts of machines that will tell him he lacks all the normal vital signs. ]

I'm... really bad at keeping up lies, sorry. But until you come up with a good one, you could use having low blood pressure, maybe? Makes you tired all the time, gives you cold hands, sometimes it's hard to feel a pulse if it's your radial artery.

[ Things he knows because that's what he has. ]

[That almost happened a day ago when Jouhei called the ambulance. Nanashi ran out on them so it never happened. Minato...that's a pretty good excuse coming from someone who admits that they can't keep up lies. smh. ]

That could cover for some of my symptoms. I don't like lying either. It's just hard to tell the truth sometimes.

[Minato's got nothing to apologize for. In most cases it's easier to be honest. Sadly, non Retrospec App users wouldn't be able to understand why all of this is happening. Nanashi will try to fudge his way out of this one...someway or another. ]

Do you know about this because of your studies?

Just don't mention the whole being dead thing if nobody asks.

[ Everything else about him is the same, mostly, so covering up symptoms might be all he needs for now, in case a friend or teacher or somebody asks about it. ]

It's personal knowledge, mostly. I like keeping my hands in my pocket for a reason, you know.

[ Keeps them toasty warm, when his own body's doing a sucky job at circulating blood. ]

I get it. All this time I thought that was just a habit of yours.

[Didn't know there was a reason behind it. Nanashi makes this expression of both surprise and understanding. It's that face people make when they realize something "oh". Suddenly it all makes sense.]

You do know a lot. I'll take your advice and not tell more people than I need to.

[So far only his family and close friends are aware of his condition. He intends to keep it that way. ]

[ It's also that! It's also a lot of things, but telling people it's because his hands are cold is one of the only acceptable reasons for them that gets them to stop talking about it. ]

I've never been a proper senpai to give advice to people, so... [ Most people he gives advice to doubt his advice... understandably. But Nanashi's going through most serious things than they are, so Minato wants to take special care to to be sincere about it. ]

[You know what Minato's getting? Another pinch to the face if he doesn't think fast. Yeah, have fun with that! ]

Would you look at that? My hand slipped, sorry.

[He's saying that with some dead sarcasm. It was totally intentional!!!]

I don't think you're a bad senpai. You're a little stupid at times, but everyone's got moments like that.

[ Yeah, he can tell that's intentional, nobody's hand slips upward and accidentally grabs their senpai's cheek!! ]

Ouch... Sometimes I do stupid things, but I'm not stupid. There's some risk-benefit calculation going on behind what I do.

[ Sometimes his calculations are just a little off. ]

No one's perfect. If you make a mistake then you just have to learn from it.

[This conversation seems...familiar. It makes Nanashi a little happy. He's glad that not everything's changed. That gives him some peace of mind.]

I may have pinched you harder than I intended to. Take this as an apology.

[Minato gets one strawberry candy for his troubles.]

[ Getting lectured by a middle schooler is sure feeling familiar, yes. So is the apology candy, which Minato takes in cupped hands, holds it carefully like it's made of precious gold. ]

We never found out where he got them from, huh...

[ Truly precious. Minato closes his hand around the candy, and then holds his fist back out to Nanashi. ]

Why don't you hold onto it? For when you need some cheering up.

Guess we didn't. [He chuckles a little. ] It's fine.

I don't have much of an appetite anymore. It's like I can't even feel my stomach.

[Depression ruins all appetites! So he wouldn't appreciate the candy as much as he would have a few days ago....It's safer in Minato's hands.]

Shit, it's weird saying that. I told you to eat food all the time before...

[ Minato knows what that feels like- not wanting to eat, feeling sick if he does, but knowing that his body needs the food even if he doesn't want it. That's different for somebody who is dead, isn't it? They don't need to eat. ]

Save it for when you do feel like it again. For me, I like eating with people.

[ When things are a little happier, stuff's easier to stomach. ]

[Yup. A dead person doesn't really need those nutrients. Nanashi can make it through the day just by sleeping...which he's been doing a lot of. ]

Food always tastes better when you share it with someone else. That reminds me... I haven't eaten anything for two days or so. [Woops.]

What's the longest time you've gone without food, senpai? [He knows about your poor eating habits. ]

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