OPEN POST ♞ I'M A KITTY CAT AND I DANCE DANCE DANCE

[tarotcards]

WHO: Souji Narukami, his 12 cats, and everyone else
WHERE: His extremely haunted and probably in need of animal control's attention house
WHEN: 03/15
WHAT: Souji tries to pretend that it's not his birthday (it's technically not, it's five days in advance) and says that it's his cat's birthday instead. A party where anyone and everyone is invited to Die
WARNINGS: Dumb kids doing dumb things

ONE

Throughout the entire city, you might find flyers stuck up on walls and pillars. Each one has the following drawing, message, and address on them:

"COME CELPURRATE CREAM-SAN'S FANGTASTIC BIRTHDAY PAWTY OF THE YEAR. FUREE FOOD AND DRINKS, I'M NOT KITTEN YOU. BRING YOUR PAWSITIVE CATITUDE (๑✪ᆺ✪๑)✧"

Yeah, that's... that's about it. Below the message contains an address and reiterates that everyone and anyone is invited. Well, free food and drinks, who could really turn that down? Even if it seems like this is a party for furries and is celebrating a cat's birthday, how bad could it be?

Well, the front lawn has a random plastic kiddie pool so maybe that is enough of a warning, but upon entering, it's really not as bad as it seems. Sure, you're going to have to put on these headbands with cat-ears on them and you may need to have a nametag with your name as a cat pun but asides from that, the free food and drinks are there as said in the flyers. Nearly all the food is cat-shaped if it could be helped, from paw-shaped cookies to a cat-shaped cat, but there are normal things too. You know, spiked punch and some poor unfortunate soul who is stuck on the grill to hand burgers or hot dogs. All the good stuff.

Over in the corner of the kitchen through is a mysterious little table that has the sign "TRY IT... IF YOU DARE..." taped onto it. On the table are little plates of... peculiar dishes: a bowl of some mysterious meat that gives off quite a foul smell, cups of coffee so thick that it might as well be sludge and gives off purple smoke (thanks, Elliot), crackers with cat tuna smeared onto them, and little bowls of nothing but pure wasabi in them. It looks like this is a table only for those with a brave heart and an iron stomach so increase your courage here or just stick to the safer foods around the kitchen.

Souji isn't responsible for any deaths or injuries.

TWO

Asides from the foods, you might want to try the random games around the house. There are your usual friendship-ruining games such as Marco Party, Marco Kart, or Monopoly but if you like to keep your friends for another day, you can go play with the twelve cats or fox that Souji apparently has at his house. You can also go over and pay respect to the birthday girl, Cream-san, who is chilling on a chair and is wearing both a birthday crown and cape. She will accept gifts in forms of head pats and belly rubs, but if you're not feeling that, you could also go outside and chill in that tiny plastic kiddie pool. Sure, you might have to be crossing your legs or putting them on top of another person's if you want to share the pool but it'd be a good bonding experience.

You know what else is a good bonding experience?

Water balloon fights. Who cares if it's early spring and that it's still a little chilly? That you could probably catch a cold and freeze out here if you're wet? This all builds character so grab those water balloons and make some new friends by flinging it at someone's face. That's how all friendships start.

THREE

Did you know that this house is haunted? That's right, it has its very own resident ghost all the way in the basement. Some shabby signs around the house encourage for people to head downstairs where it looks like it's the meeting room of some cult. The lights are turned off and the only things that light up the basement are the candles placed around on tables. There is a TV in the corner that shows off nothing but static and lets out a high pitch sound.

In the centre of the room is a plain table with two chairs, one on each side. On the table is an ouija board and a note on it that reads:

"SPEAK TO THE DEAD. THE DEAD WANTS TO KNOW IF YOU ATE YOUR VEGGIES AND WHAT YOUR FAVOURITE TYPE OF COOKIES ARE."

Yeah, the resident ghost of the house is an old grandma who just wants to make sure that the kids are eating properly and wants to share her amazing cookie recipes with you. She also has a dead ghost cat named Mittens who will also probably take over the ouija board and knock it over like the good cat that she is. Even in the dead, cats will love knocking shit over.

FOUR

If you head out to the backyard to get some fresh air, there's... well, there's really no way to explain this but just saying that there is a dragon just chilling out there. There is yet another sign hung around its neck:

"SIT IN MY MOUTH AND TAKE A PHOTO. 80% GUARANTEE THAT IT'LL BE SAFE. 0% GUARANTEE YOU'LL COME OUT SMELLING LIKE ROSES. CALL SOUJI IF YOU WANT A DIFFERENT MONSTER TO TERRORIZE YOUR LIFE."

So yeah, this is just... a photo booth where you can take pictures of seemingly being eaten by a dragon, getting lifted into the air by a fire demon, chased by a mummy with a knife, nearly getting stabbed by a bancho god, or just chilling with whatever the hell this thing is. It's nice to abuse your Personas for mundane things.

Comments

[tarotcards]

[ yeah after like 20 mins, souji is going to knock on the door to see what's up ]

[ knock knock ]

[compendiem]

[ predictably, there's no answer. he can try the handle, but it appears to be locked. what will Souji do? ]

[tarotcards]

[ you know what souji will do? souji won't break down his door but he'll go downstairs, outside, and get the ladder so he can climb up to his bedroom window to see if minato locked that as well ]

[compendiem]

[ He did not lock it because he didn't think Souji would try climbing his own bedroom window, so there's a vaguely surprised Minato staring at the window from where he'd burrito'd himself in the blankets on Souji's bed.

It was too warm and comfortable to get out, sorry. Also too warm and comfortable to reach the window, though, so there's Souji's chance to infiltrate his room. ]

[tarotcards]

[ souji infiltrates his own room by opening the window and awkwardly climbing through. it's hard for anyone to look cool and composed when they're scrambling through a small window like some kind of blind crab. he accidentally knocks over some papers on his desk and a book and maybe have pulled a bit too hard on the curtains by accidentally grabbing onto it but he gets through and he stands before minato. ]

How could you?

[compendiem]

Easily.

[ Guiltlessly. Amusedly, as he watches Souji stumble into his bedroom and take half the room down with him. ]

No available limbs. [ he pulls the covers a little more tightly around himself in demonstration. ] Couldn't get up. [ he didn't even try. ] Sorry. [ only sort of. ]

[tarotcards]

[ souji is never trusting minato in his room ever again ]

Were you planning on sleeping?

[compendiem]

There's nothing else to do in your room.

[ Forget "planned." He did fall asleep. ]

[tarotcards]

I got playing cards, some pen and paper, and a bunch of other clothes for you to try out.

[ now that he's here, he's going to prevent minato from sleeping. should have locked that window, man ]

[compendiem]

No available limbs.

[ He repeats it a little more emphatically this time. How's he supposed to do participate in any of that? Move things from place to place with his mouth? ]

[tarotcards]

You can hold a pen in your mouth, right?

[ actually, he does kind of want to see minato draw with his mouth ]

[compendiem]

No I can't.

[tarotcards]

[ souji walks to his desk, picks up a pen, and then holds out the back end in front of minato. ]

[ take it ]

[compendiem]

[ Presses his lips firmly together. His teeth are the second set of walls. Impenetrable. Souji can't shove it inside. ]

[tarotcards]

[ he's going to try anyway, pressing the end of the pen up to minato's mouth. get in, damn you ]

[compendiem]

[ He would protest, but that would mean opening his mouth and giving Souji an opening, so instead, Minato retreats inside his blanket burrito like a turtle withdrawing its head. It is now a blanket cave. ]

[tarotcards]

[ a blanket cave that cannot fight back, that's what ]

[ because souji looks at the cave and then decides to just... lift it up. souji is going to take minato downstairs whether he likes it or not ]

[compendiem]

[ Oh my god the cave is moving and it's dark inside, so much fabric that all sounds are muffled and Minato has absolutely no idea what's going on so he assumes Souji is about to toss him out the window or something. A hand gets stuck outside the opening of the pile of blankets, grabbing blindly for anything he can reach, hoping it's a table leg or a lamp or window sill or something. It probably just grabs air. ]

[tarotcards]

[ how good or bad do you want to do this, card, because he can definitely grab onto a table leg, lamp, souji's prized kandam model, a cat's tail (there are cats everywhere in the house, there is no room without at least one cat), or nothing and just have minato come downstairs so they can watch TV TOGETHER DANG MINATO. SOUJI ISN'T CRUEL ENOUGH TO THROW YOU OUT THE WINDOW ]

[compendiem]

[ LOOK, HE KNOWS WHAT HE DESERVES and maybe this knowledge should prompt him to act kinder and be more considerate, but that's the furthest thing from Minato's mind right now, whose hand manages to find that prized kandam model, wrist stiffening in confusion for a moment because what is this?? he doesn't recognize what this is by touch. Both their lives are in Souji's hands right now, don't trip down the stairs. ]

[tarotcards]

[ souji makes it out of his bedroom before he realizes what minato is holding. that... that is his perfect grade tx-68 kandam type-ii. the one that took him days to build and that he put out as one of the few kanplas on display in his room because it's one of his favourite kandam models (the rest are in the kandam room he shares with shin). he immediately freezes when he sees minato holding it in his grips and he goes tense ]

... Minato.

[ his voice is suddenly serious and... fear? ]

Please be careful with what you're holding...

[compendiem]

What am I holding?

[ Quick, before Minato tries to readjust his grip so that he has a free thumb to feel around for what this might be. He can't imagine it's anything too delicate, with 12 cats running around all the time. ]

[tarotcards]

[ should he joke and give a fake answer like he normally does? or should he actually reply with a real serious answer? the fear in his body has him choosing the latter ]

A 1/60 Perfect Grade TX-68 Kandam Type-II Kanpla.

[ that... probably sounds like gibberish ]

[compendiem]

[ Yeah, this real answer sounds like a fake answer. ]

Carry me back to bed and I'll relinquish this... [ uh ] ...thing.

[tarotcards]

[ get educated, minato. learn about the wonderful universal era of kandam and then get into all alternate universes of the spin-offs ]

... all right, I'll do as you say but only if you keep a firm grip on that.

[ this is the one time that souji will give in. he will start heading back into the room because fuck you, man, he likes his kandams and set minato down ]