Desperate For Changing, Starving For Truth...

[bitemefightme]

WHO: Fai and Orion (closed)
WHERE: Orion's apartment
WHEN: December 13
WHAT: Orion's trying to clean up his act (pun intended)
WARNINGS: Semi-chaotic mess? Brief mentions of alcoholism. That should be the worst of it.


Orion had finally gotten down to trying to figure out how to clean his house. The last time he did, Biffy was there. And, well, it would definitely be a lie to say he went on the straight and narrow right after that. With cleaning at least. He quit alcohol immediately. And... that withdrawal wasn't fun. He just wanted to stay in bed for a long time. Hence.... why he's only getting off his ass to clean up after himself a week later. Which is.... easier? He thinks?

It's not like the months on end he used to go. Actually, he'd never bothered to clean up after himself in his own apartment before. So. This is otherwise a new experience altogether. And the only reason is because of the look of disappointment on Biffy's face when he saw it all. Amongst a conversation that opened Orion's eyes to his own addiction and how it was a problem.

Nope, today he's definitely going to do his best! He's got this.

And he grabs a trash bag and starts to sift through the small mountain of stuff beside the coffee table. He makes it through two trash bags worth of stuff before he gets to the clothes littered in his apartment. Except...

How does he sort these again? He's supposed to throw them in the laundry, but he just... actually can't remember the exact way Biffy showed him. Colours are supposed to be separated from whites, right? Or was that blacks? Something about colours bleeding and stuff.

Shit.

So he just.... stares at it. Trying to figure it out, like the answer will magically jump out at him.

Comments

[flowrite]

It really hasn't been that long since Fai was here, back in his old apartment building, but it feels like forever. A lot has happened since then, just with getting settled into the new house and getting settled into the new pattern of life that comes with suddenly having two adopted children, a ward, and an almost as good as live-in boyfriend. It definitely feels long enough that Fai's been feeling guilty for abandoning Orion. Especially when he knows that Orion's been going through some tough stuff lately.

But then again, life hasn't exactly been a walk in the park for Fai the last few months either, has it?

He's making a special trip today, because one of his appointments at work has him in the neighborhood. Hopefully Orion's up and about, not hungover or still sleeping at this time of the day--either way, Fai has a key if the door's locked. He'd be happy to catch Orion and make sure his friend and ex-neighbor is eating and taking care of himself, but if nothing else he can at least clean the place up a bit to help out. Orion's... pretty bad about cleaning his apartment.

Fai already has the key to the apartment in hand as he knocks on the door, not knowing whether he'll find Orion here or not. Maybe he should have called ahead....

[bitemefightme]

Orion glances up at the door as he hears the knock. And he has no idea who it could be. He didn't invite anyone over, Baren would have just lockpicked his way in, and Fai lives somewhere completely different now.

He glances one more time at the piles of clothes in front of him before getting up and heading to the door. He unlocks the latch and when he opens it, he sees...

"Fai?" He's actually blinking in mild confusion and surprise. He totally wasn't expecting Fai to show up at his place.

Fai should be able to see past Orion's shoulder into the apartment, with the two full garbage bags and the piles of wrinkled clothes in a (very poor) attempt to be sorted out. In Orion's hand is a red, button up, seemingly new-ish shirt that he was trying to sort into another pile.

So, awkward question time.

"Hey, can you show me how to sort laundry?"

A beat.

"Please?"

[flowrite]

Well. This is... not what Fai expected. At all.

He stands in the doorway for a moment, just looking between the garbage bags, the piles of laundry, and back at Orion, before giving Orion a warm (and sliiightly amused) smile.

"Of course! How new is that one?" He nods to the red shirt in Orion's hands. "If you haven't washed it before there's a chance it might bleed. You'll want to run it with towels or dark clothes, something that won't turn funny colors if the red runs."

[bitemefightme]

Orion looks down at the shirt in his hand.

And there's that word again, bleed. Yup, that was the information he was looking for.

"Got it like... last month. I went shopping to find something to cover up my collar, and Biffy helped me pick some shirts out."

Another pause while Orion thinks.

And then steps aside to let Fai in.

"Uhm... Sorry, you can come in."

If Fai dares to look around, he won't find a single liquor bottle anywhere. Not the fridge, the sink, nor the floor. Some of his dishes are actually still clean, even if there's a clustered pile in the sink as evidence of the last week he's had. But, overall, Orion's house should be resembling something more livable.

And speaking of...

"...Sorry. I haven't been grocery shopping in the last week. I don't think I have anything to offer you right now." Another thought. "If you want, we can go get something after I get this stuff sorted. ...And started."

He's.... going to need a bit of help figuring it all out again. But he's genuinely trying.

[flowrite]

Fai doesn't look at all worried that it took Orion this long to invite him inside. Mostly he just looks amused at that part. The apartment does come as a surprise, but a welcome one. Each time Fai's been here, whether Orion was home or not, Fai has held out the small but persistent hope that this might be the time that it sticks, that Orion manages to keep the place picked up and tidy--not because Fai needs it to be clean lest it offend his delicate sensibilities, but because it's healthier for Orion. Both physically and mentally.

And... he's still not sure about that shirt. Gonna have to throw it in with the darks, just to be safe.

"Do you mind if I...?" He holds a hand out for the shirt, intending to start shuffling clothes between the piles himself so he can show Orion what to do. "That's fine, I don't need anything just yet. But we can go shopping if you want! It looks really nice in here Orion, I'm impressed!"

[bitemefightme]

Orion goes ahead and holds the shirt out to Fai, with the full intention of observing.

"Yea, Biffy helped me clean it up last week." Another pause. "....And then I was floored and felt like shit for the last week, so... I haven't gotten back to it until now."

Quitting liquor hurt. Much more than he had anticipated. But he made it, through the headaches, the nausea, and even the heightened hallucinations for the first couple days. He managed to push through the worst of it, and make it to the milder symptoms of the withdrawal.

With any luck, it'll be easy from here.

"You think it really looks good, though? I'm trying to get better at it."

[flowrite]

He's been doing his own laundry for so long that Fai's movements are automatic, shuffling Orion's laundry into neat piles. He knows Orion is watching though, so he's careful to make comments as he works, showing Orion what to do.

And he's really itching to ask Orion who this "Biffy" is, but concern overshadows curiosity for the moment.

"You felt...? What happened?"

He's definitely noticed the apartment looks cleaner, but there's so much to take in that he hasn't connected the lack of liquor bottles with Orion's explanation just yet.

[bitemefightme]

Oh, right. He didn't tell anyone else yet.

"I quit drinking. Biffy helped me see how bad it was, and I stopped altogether. Haven't touched it since."

He thinks back to then and the promise he made. All the things he told the other man.

"Fai, he... he didn't run, when I told him about Lilly. When I told him I might have been a murderer in my past life." And it makes him so happy that Biffy stayed. Orion smiles a bit over the memory. "I want to be good enough for him."

He wants to be able to ask Biffy to be his boyfriend someday. Soon, if he can help it. But he knows he needs to do better first. To be able to clean up after himself, and stay stable.

"I'm trying my best."

[flowrite]

So... maybe it stings a little, that Fai has tried so hard for so long to help Orion with all of this stuff--cleaning the apartment, getting him back on his meds, getting him off booze, telling him he's not a bad person just because he has bad memories--and then apparently this Biffy person swoops in and saves the day? Fai mulls this over as he finishes sorting the laundry and moves to put the first load in the wash.

It's not like he's ever had any sort of claim on Orion anyway. He likes Orion, but even if he weren't with Iwai, they've already both acknowledged that they would be terrible for each other. So it's not that. Orion deserves to be happy, and if this Biffy makes him happy, more power to him.

Maybe... it's just the feeling of failure that stings, Fai thinks. That he tried so hard for so long and couldn't get half so far.

But that's his shortcoming, and it's not Orion's fault. So once the first load of laundry is in, he turns to Orion with a big, cheery, teasing smirk.

"So... 'Biffy,' huh? When did this happen?"

[bitemefightme]

Orion gives it a moment's thought, as he recollects the time frame.

"We met in October, and started going on dates last month." Right away, in fact. He had asked him on one on the first, over the Retrospec app. "We hit it off alot better than I thought."

It became date after date after date, before he even realised it.

"It's... alot different than what I'm used to. Usually everyone just sleeps with m--" he pauses, paling a little bit. He probably shouldn't bring that up. He doesn't want to make Fai feel awkward about what happened between them. But that slipped by his lips alot more than he had expected it to. He probably didn't catch it in time to keep Fai from knowing what he was going to say next. It's been a subject that he's been relatively careful around, if only because he dreaded to some extent that Fai regretted it, and he didn't want to serve as that painful reminder of everything.

He rubs the back of his neck.

"He's really nice to me." He's still going to try to cover it up anyway. "Not like my first boyfriend was."

And then he flusters.

"NotthatBiffy'smyboyfriend..." Holy geez, what did he just say? "I mean... I plan to ask him. ........Someday. I just want to be better first."